As the great Samuel L. Jackson would say, “let me get this straight, motherfuckers”, I am so tired of hearing everybody freak out about THE NEW POTENTIAL LOVE INTEREST in Iron Man 3. I mean, come on, we’ve all freaked out when Scarlett decided to join the superhero flick, and for - ONCE - and only once, I haven’t seen her make out with the main character, Tony Stark, thus ruining his and Pepper’s pre-established sort of romantic relationship. 

And damn straight, I freaked out, because look at Scarlett and you’ll see why. But it wasn’t that way. Jon Favreau realized that the heart of the movie were Tony and Pepper and he did not screw that up. Neither Shane Black will because we have RDJ, who’s the captain of our ship, no, honestly, he is. 

And yeah, okay, just assuming they’ll split up. Tony spends far too much time with Maya, trying to figure out the Extremis project and how they’ll manage to track down the bad guy, and maybe, maybe Pepper gets jealous and thinks of it in a different sort of way, and she decides to break up with him. Jon Favreau mentioned that he wanted a love scene with her with his shirt on, so I’m assuming that if that happens, Tony and her would be sepparated already. 

And guysss, just read the Extremis comics. Maya is hot, yes, but Scarlett was too as Black Widow, and on top of it all, Tony Stark and her almost got married in the comics, whereas I don’t think Maya and Tony have had sex. Correct me if I’m wrong. 

I’m just hoping that if they split up, they’ll get back together in the end of the movie by having HOT MAKE-UP SEX. 

AND ONE MORE THING. TONY LOVES HER AND PEPPER LOVES HIM TOO. SO, JUST GO AHEAD AND MAKE A WRONG MOVE. I AM WATCHING YOU WHILE YOU SLEEP, SHANE. 

THAT’S ALL, FOLKS.

Cause…